January  9,  2004

        i'm looking at the weather pixie in the side bar and somehow she's managing to still smile as she shows me it's -21C.  MINUS TWENTY ONE!

       That is holy coldness, Batman.  Sheesh.  i don't even know what it translates to in Fahrenheit - and even though i'd probably understand it better (okay, so i'm metric-challenged) if i tried to figure it out - it wouldn't change the fact that you can turn into a popsicle in 3.5 seconds out there tonight.  

      That's the problem with our winters in the city ... it stays practically balmy until the very last minute and our blood stays appropriately thin ... and then wham!  Suddenly you are searching for all the iron building, blood thickening, foods you can find. 

      The upside of course, is snuggling with Himself is all the more delicious.

      The downside of course, is that our already infrequent play-at-home sessions suffer 'cause it's just too darn COLD!  And my son has the portable heater at his house.  And this morning i forgot the ear muffs (that don't stay on well because i don't want them on the top of my head and mess my hair - the very same hair that is so thin on top that there's not a chance of it ever keeping my head warm.)  So by the time i got to the coffee shop where my ride picks me up for work, i couldn't feel my ears.  Or my fingers.  my toes were screaming; "what the f*ck!"  (Sorry Sir, i know i'm not supposed to swear.  It was my toes!  i swear it.  Err.  Well, whatever.)

      Heh.  How can you tell i'm indulging in my first glass of wine this week.  Home brew and not bad at all!  But we've been diligent about the get-healthier stuff.  And i even made it to the gym for my power walks 3 times this week.  Today i cranked up the speed even, and i could sense that little competitive bug in me rising to the challenge.  It was like a voice in my head saying; "hmm.. and just how much can i do on this thing (treadmill), anyway?  Let's try this!"  Poke, poke at the up-the-speed button.  

      It's a bit disconcerting when you feel yourself heading to the back-end and off the machine, and scrambling against that potentially embarrassing moment. i did manage to stay on though.  The instructor came by and commented that i'd been there twice this week.  i found it necessary to retort that today was my third time.  She was duly impressed.  Then i couldn't help it .. i had to say it.  

      "It must be my masochistic tendencies for pain."  She laughed, and then i admitted to actually feeling pretty good after a session, and that it probably was the endorphin rush. And she agreed!  i wonder if she ...

      Himself does His talk at the tops 'n bottoms munch this Monday, and i admit that i'm getting nervous about it.  i keep worrying that i'll screw something up and embarrass Him.  It's one thing to have all our lifestyle home things sorted out and ritualized, but we've stepped back from the public scene for a long time now.  So on one hand, i'm looking forward to it - socializing and meeting new and very like-minded people.  But on the other hand, i'm nervous.  He, meanwhile, seems cool, calm and collected.  As always.  Figures.  

      And what should i wear? 

      i have visions of myself at 85 trying to get into my corset.  It's not pretty.